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Archive for October, 2011

NT scan…went.  So, Baby B was acting up and wouldn’t cooperate for the camera.  He / she was looking straight on so they couldn’t get the nasal bone measurement and she barely got the neck fold measurement.  Apparently with twins, you need both measurements on both babies or else they can’t be considered.  Baby A was lying in perfect position of course.  That Baby B will be my trouble, I just know it! I told Chris it was HIS baby that wouldn’t cooperate… 🙂  But, they did my blood draw and will do the other at 16 weeks and I’ll get results but they won’t be as definitive as they would with pairing with the measurements.  Oh well, what can you do?  In great news, both babies looked awesome!  Measuring right on target with solid HBs of 160 and 155.  Baby A we got an awesome picture of him / her waving and then going to suck his / her thumb and a shot of him / her sitting indian style (or wait – is it called criss cross apple sauce now?).  Baby B had the hiccups – it was funny!

They did see the bleed and it looks like it’s measuring smaller, so it may have shrunk!  She said it looked to be around 1cm now and both of them don’t feel it’s a huge risk at all.  How awesome was that to hear?!  She also said that they have perfect looking placentas and their placenta positioning is great – opposite sides of the uterus. They also commented that the separation membrane between the sacs looked excellent as well!  I go for my second blood draw at 16 weeks and then another u/s at 18 weeks.  Due to having twins, they will be monitoring me in addition to my OB.  I’m so thrilled by that!  I’ll continue my regular monthly OB appointments, but the MFM team at the hospital will be monitoring me via u/s on a regular basis (monthly, then weekly). 

I was SHOCKED at the level of care at the MFM center at the hospital.  I had low expectations as I guess I didn’t know what to expect – that and I didn’t even know about this extended care they offer me for carrying twins!  The genetics counselor was so awesome – I absolutely adored her!  I never met the MFM but apparently he was watching with the counselor.  All I could think of was Oz from the Wizard of Oz – “don’t look at the man behind the curtain”!  The u/s tech was a traveling one and she had the sweetest Texan accent and was so cute – I loved it!  The genetics counselor was seriously so jazzed up about how awesome my placentas were and how great the kids look – I left feeling amazing and all pepped up like it was my own cheerleading squad!  Guys, my placentas are AWESOME!!!  Haha, it was crazy.  My SIL was great to be there with me, too, so it was just a really wonderful experience.

The bleeding is still light, even after all the pushing with the u/s.  I’m hoping this is moving into our past.  I feel so much better after the visit…now to decide when we “go public” with the news…  Probably in the next week or so.

And, well, don’t you want pictures?!  Of course they’re only of Baby A since Baby B wasn’t cooperating so well.

Baby A Sucking His / Her Thumb

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Baby A Sitting Indian Style - little feet on the left!

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Baby A Waving Hi!

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I spent another 7 hours at the ER on Saturday due to bleeding.  The good news is that both babies measured on target, had solid heartbeats, and were moving all around in there.  You could even see the tiny bones in their spine – they looked like little halloween skeletons on the screen!  The bad news is – the bleed is still there and hasn’t been reabsorbed.  They called it a subplacental bleed this time and said it was focused on Baby A.

Yesterday, I had my monthly OB appointment and came prepared with my husband and a list of questions a mile long.  (You’ll love this one: when I got my OB card back that tracks everything my OB had left the sticky note in there that the nurse had written that said “Has lots of questions”…I might start getting a reputation at this practice!)  This was my meeting of the 3rd OB other than my main one and I absolutely LOVED her. She sat right down and allowed me to pepper her with my questions (and even my husband slid a few in there).  Basically, she didn’t have the actual prints of the u/s from Saturday but had the report and she thinks it’s the same bleed and not another one – but doesn’t know for sure. Apparently, perigestational bleeds / subplacental bleeds / and SCHs are essentially the same thing.  Who knew?  It is about 3cm at it’s longest length and it’s kind of an oblong shape (which makes me think it’s the same since that is how the original one was).  She repeated what I assumed and that there is absolutely nothing that can be done, nothing can be taken or stopped as far as medicines, vitamins, and supplements go, no amount of bed rest would help, and it’s a wait and see game.  I don’t like waiting and seeing – I just want it to stop already and for everything to be okay.  I’m not asking much, I don’t think.

Essentially, the placentas are generating new cells all the way through Week 14 (I’m currently 12w1d).  As the new cells generate, they dig into the uterine wall.  This is what can sometimes create these bleeds as they continue to dig and implant. She said that the bleeding should stop on or about Week 14 as that is when the cells stop generating and the placenta just increases in size at that point.  She said by Week 12, you’re miscarriage rate is less than 1% – without bleeding.  Since I was diagnosed with bleeding at Week 9, my miscarriage rate was at 50% (TOTALLY didn’t know that one…) but that with each week that goes by, it drops.  So I’m probably around the 40% mark now – but there’s no black and white formula for it.  That is a scary number that I don’t like – but what we’re holding onto is that both babies have been thriving so far and don’t appear to be affected by all the bleeding.  Our new target is 14 weeks – 2 weeks from yesterday. And with that, we likely will hold off announcing the pregnancy more broadly until then.  As I’ve said, it’s always an exciting thing to announce – but telling the story of a loss is much, much harder.  I’m being a little extra cautious about it – but I think I have to at this point.  Although, my intent to not buy maternity clothes yet may have to be waived as I’m running out of yoga pants…and none of my jeans fit.  I did the rubberband trick last night with a pair of jeans so I could go out to dinner.  Oy.  And to think I’ve actually LOST 2 lbs. since my first OB visit?!  Must be from stress as I’m eating and my pants DO NOT fit. 

In more positive news, we got to hear the heartbeats for the first time yesterday!!  That was totally awesome and I’m so glad my husband got to hear that before he leaves for his six weeks of training.  Baby B was the first one and you could hear him / her moving, too – not shocking as that baby never stops moving I’m convinced.  Baby A’s was a little slower – but we’ve already coined him / her with being lazy, so not surprising there. She also checked my cervix as the hospital indicated I did not have a mucus plug (something I thought was essential, but apparently it isn’t) and everything is sealed up nice and tight.

So – we are status quo right now.  No heavy lifting, complete “pelvic rest”, and just try and lie low.  If the red blood returns or the flow increases, I have to go back.  Last night, the flow was probably the heaviest it has been – but I just don’t think it makes sense to call today since I was just seen yesterday and I have my first trimester scan on Thursday, so I’ll get to see them again (with my lovely SIL who has agreed to come along!) and hopefully they’ll still be looking good.  If you read this and are the praying type, please keep the peanuts in your prayers.  We all need them right now!

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I’m afraid to say there “isn’t much to report” because when I did that last week I started bleeding again.  But, here I am in my 11th week and we’re hanging in there!  I’ve been dealing with awful, terrible old Crinone discharge earlier in the week but now that seems to be gone but I’m still spotting a dark brown discharge (blood).  It’s seriously the grossest thing ever.  The Crinone stuff was almost black and gross and just YUCK.  I would typically be nervous since there was a lot of it and it was black and yucky but I assume it’s just old build-up since it’s been over a week since I stopped the Crinone.  I have been really uneasy the last few days, though, because I’m still sort of bleeding.  It’s only when I wipe and it’s not red and no cramping so I’m trying to keep it all in perspective.  Of course Googling “SCH” or “perigestational bleed” and reading some of the negative stories doesn’t help – but there are a lot of positive ones, too.  It was funny to find my own blog come up in one of the searches!

Less than a week and I get to see the babies again – my NT first trimester scan is scheduled for Thursday and I’m looking forward to it.  I think if everything looks good on Thursday we’ll may go “public” with our news.  I was planning on it but with the bleeding still going on, I’m now unsure.  My SIL is coming with me – I thought it would be nice to ask her to come along and I didn’t really want to go to yet another u/s alone.  I also have my monthly OB appointment on Monday – not sure what they do other than weigh me, take my vitals, and ask how things are going?  Maybe they have a doppler in that office and they’ll check for HBs?  No clue. 

Chris leaves for training for 6 weeks on Tuesday afternoon.  I am scared and nervous and even a bit looking forward to it if we’re being honest. 😉  I know after like 2 weeks I’ll be dying for him to come back, but I am mostly looking forward to my house remaining clean and not struggling to fall asleep next to a snoring mess.  His dad is going down for the first few days with him, which is nice since I couldn’t make it.  It’s going to be tough down there for him – class 6 days a week, learning a whole new company, new SOPs, new flying regulations (FAR Part 121 if you were curious), PLUS a new plane.  We still don’t know what he will be assigned to – either the Airbus 320 or the Embraer 190.  We have been receiving packages of information from JetBlue and it really seems like we made the right decision for our future.  The pay cut and reserve schedule will BLOW for a few years, but we’ll adjust and we’ll survive. 

One thing we’re trying to decide on is if we stop the COBRA coverage we’re currently paying $900.00 a month for to maintain the fertility coverage.  It’s like a safety blanket if, god forbid, something happens with this pregnancy – but it’s a LOT of money to be putting out, especially considering the pay cut.  The benefits with JetBlue are really good – they just don’t have fertility coverage.  So, if something did happen, we’d be paying all out of pocket for subsequent treatments.  Then again, once I’m into my 13th week or so and officially in my second trimester, that risk goes so far down.  I don’t know – I’m torn and really unsure of what the right decision is.  We have 30 days after his hire date to make a decision – that will bring us to November 19th and we’re paid up on COBRA through the end of November.  I’ll be 16 weeks as of the 14th.  I guess we’ll wait and see.

Still having a pretty low symptom pregnancy – pure exhaustion and peeing a lot.  The sore boobs that I thought were induced by the Crinone (and probably were to some extent) are still here so we’ll add that in the mix.  I started having some crazy, vivid dreams which I heard is also a symptom.  Still no sickness – not even once!  If it wasn’t for the perigestational bleed, I would say I am a pretty good pregnant gal – just took some modern technology to get me here.  I’ve been good about what I’m eating – I actually think other than some fertility treatment weight gain (which happened prior to my positive test where I couldn’t work out), I’m maintaining a 1 lb. gain.  I can totally see everything shifting, though – and Chris said my B belly is getting bigger on the top (I’ve always had a pooch in my lower abdominal region – even when I was skinny!) and I can see it, too.  I think it will be merging soon and will become a D belly.  Until then – no belly shots! 🙂

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Remember yesterday when we were celebrating how awesome it was that I made it over a week without an incident?  Ya me too…fast forward to this morning when I woke up and was bleeding…again.  I called my OB’s office immediately and they got me in for an u/s and appointment at 1:30pm.  So, I did a little work to distract myself and headed into the office.

Well, I’m back – and I still have two babies growing strong!  Both were measuring right on target and had HBs of 173bpm and 171bpm.  Baby B was his / her normal active self – doing flips most of the time, moving all around.  I only got one picture since he / she was being a gymnast.  Baby A was in his / her normal lazy position lying on his / her belly.  Of course I said this out loud to the tech and all of a sudden Baby A starting jumping – literally jumping with its legs – and we both burst out laughing.  Guess he / she heard me! 😉  And the perigestational bleed – is still fucking there.  Doesn’t appear to have grown but it hasn’t absorbed either.  I’m on pelvic rest, still – she said no sex and I started snickering.  I don’t think she understood the humor but there hasn’t been any nookie since before my ER.  It is what it is!  The bleeding has already slowed down to more or less spotting – which continues to be a good sign.  We’ll look for it again at my NT scan on the 20th and hope it’s been absorbed by then (doubt it but we’ll see).  I feel better knowing my little peanuts are doing so well in there – that damn bleed better just do what it needs to do and then get the hell out and leave us alone!

Oh and before I close – you deserve new pics:

Baby A

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Baby B

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
EDIT PS – I just looked at the Dashboard for my website and one of the most common search terms that has lead people to this blog is “is there PCOS in snails?”  Ummm, really?  LOL.

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I can proudly say we made it from Week 9 to Week 10 without any sort of run to the ER or OB incident, so that’s a success right?  But of course on Monday I had some major black/dark brown Crinone (progesterone suppository) discharge and did kind of freak out for a second.  I did some clearing out Tuesday morning (I know, wicked fucking gross but, alas, this is my pregnancy…) and it was much less throughout the day on Tuesday and Wednesday (just little flecks which is quasi-normal for me and Crinone) and today I did some more “cleaning” and it seems to be all jammed up in there.  It’s so damn gross and it was just so weird that it was so dark and so much with the Crinone but I am proud of myself for not freaking out and not running to my OB demanding an u/s. No cramping and everything else relatively normal so I have to think I shouldn’t be concerned.  It’s probably just some old blood from the perigestational bleed – at least that is what I keep telling myself.  I just want to see the babies on the 20th at my first trimester (NT) scan and know all is okay – I sure hope it is…

My damn MIL asked Chris yesterday when we were going public. There is a family event this Sunday (that I can’t attend due to a charity dinner I’ve committed to) and I think she wanted to tell everyone!!! At first I was pissed that SHE wants to tell OUR news, but then I calmed down enough to be happy that at least she asked. That, of course, doesn’t mean that with a few Pinot Grigios in her she won’t spill the beans anyway but here’s to hoping. People just don’t understand that it’s TOO SOON. I will be comfortable going public once I see them again and if everything is okay. And, it’s our story to tell. UGH.

I just can’t believe how low symptom this pregnancy has been and it makes me super nervous for the scan on the 20th.  I feel like they’re going to find something wrong or everything won’t all be okay…  *sigh*  Damn infertility has made me completely unable to relax into this pregnancy.  I have to keep telling myself that I am literally sitting in the 95% of bringing home at least one, if not two, babies.  Those are pretty good odds.  If only I could buy myself an u/s machine…  I am going to borrow my cousin’s fetal doppler and I plan on using that to check in on them.  I don’t think you can hear their HBs yet, though, since I’m only 10w3d.  But ya, the only symptoms are pure exhaustion and peeing often.  Everyone keeps telling me how lucky I am that I haven’t puked once – but sometimes I wish I was so that I’d know things were still okay.  Crazy, I know.

I have woke up the last few mornings feeling kind of crappy – like I’m coming down with a cold.  I’m trying not to freak out but I wonder if I should be checking my temperature and at what point is a cold / flu / strep risky to the babies?  God, I know NOTHING about this stuff!  I don’t even mind suffering through the cold but I just want to be sure everything remains okay with the babies.  In the meantime, I’m eating soup and drinking lots of fluids and trying to just lay low…

I am surprisingly still fitting in most of my clothes – I’m not saying they look all that great, but I am still fitting.  I am reading Belly Laughs by Jenny MacCarthy and it is so true – I’m at the stage where it looks like I’m fat and not pregnant.  Annoying!  I refuse to buy maternity clothes until after my first trimester (NT) scan on the 20th – once I know everything looks good, then I think I’ll be able to settle into my second trimester and embrace some of this stuff.  In the meantime, I laughed my tuckus off when I was looking through these wicked funny maternity shirts.  You know I’ll be buying a few of these!!!

EDIT:  Got a call back from Nurse Karen (oh how I miss her!) and I can stop the Crinone now!!  Yay, no more grossness!  She said they usually stop it around 7-8 weeks – which would have been nice to know when they graduated me…  But, I don’t think it can do any harm to the babies since some women are on it through 12 weeks.  I can’t even imagine what it’s going to be like without gunk coming out of my vagina!!!  I’ll be a whole new woman!

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